The Handyman Can

(c) 2003 Jim Morrison

The proliferation of handyman firms and franchises is on the rise and that’s a good thing. Today people know a lot less about the houses they live in than they used to. I wasn’t around back then but folks who were tell me that fifty years ago, people produced more of their own food and clothing, and did many home and auto repairs themselves as well. These days it’s the rare person who knows which end of a screwdriver to hold, so we’re hiring a lot more work out than we used to.

My father grew up in the same house as his grandparents during and after the Depression. My great grandfather, Denis Kenney was a great one for tools. He landed in Malden, MA from County Roscommon and shoveled coal for most of his career until he turned 65 and he was promoted to a Fireman 1^st class, which meant he tended the boilers at the coal yard. Pa loved his garden and his workshop and spent most of his free time working in one or the other. They were his hobbies and the only two places he could sip whiskey in peace.

When he was about 10 years old, my Dad started doing chores, cutting grass, and other small jobs for other folks in his parish. The way he tells it, it went something like: “Allan, could you come over and repair my fence?” The budding young capitalist would reply: “No trouble at all Mrs. Breen, I’ll be over tomorrow.” Then he’d run home and ask his grandfather to show him what to do. Its not surprising that he’d grow up to be a civil engineer. And later, a home inspector.

I don’t want to sound like an old crank (because I’m still just a young crank) but they don’t make kids like that any more. Shoot, most people I know can’t get their kids to mow their own lawn or shovel their own driveway, let alone do it for someone else. Its been that way for a while now and those kids who don’t work with their hands grow into adults who can’t work with their hands. It’s a pity too, because working with your hands is fun and rewarding. Skeptical? Come on over to my place this weekend and I’ll put you to work. You’ll see.

So it is that the handyman has evolved into an industry. I googled up 434,000 hits on the word “Handyman” including web sites filled with tips for the do-it-yourselfer, franchise opportunities, and sites that can locate a handyman near you. My favorite was www.rent-a-husband.com. At first I couldn’t imagine why women would want to hire these fellas to sit on their couch all weekend drinking beer and watching TV, but it turns out they are actually a handyman franchise. See, even I learn something researching these columns.

Handymen are a jack of most trades, but master of none. That’s important to remember. They are a lower cost alternative to hiring licensed tradespeople for small jobs. You don’t want to pay big bucks to have a finish carpenter come out to your house and refasten a loose door on your kitchen cabinets. A handyman is perfect for that kind of thing. They clean gutters, do a little painting, replace light switches, fix leaky faucets, and a pickup-truck-full of other little things that the man of the house would have done 50 years ago. It is important, however, for them to know their limits. For example, nobody but a licensed electrician should be running new circuits in your electrical panel (and even a few of them don’t do it so well). Consider this: you’re pretty good at your job, right? Could someone with almost no training walk into your cube and do what you do? Don’t let an unqualified, over-eager handyman fool with your home. Make sure everyone is comfortable they understand the scope of the job and the experience of the workmen.

I ‘m lucky to know a terrific handyman. He’s a recently retired, skilled carpenter who isn’t ready to hang up his tool belt just yet. He isn’t too busy to take on a part-time project on short notice and is careful not to get into a situation he can’t handle. He’s the kind of guy everyone would love to have working at their house for 2-3 days a year to fix all those little things that have been bugging you, but you’re too busy driving to soccer games to take care of-so I guard his name carefully. If the word gets out about this guy, I’ll never be able to get a hold of him when I need him.

Jim Morrison
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